…Your body believes
everything you tell it.
The first part is a title I borrowed from a book I read decades ago, by devout Christian writer and metaphysician, Florence Schovel Shinn. She was totally on the money! But stay with me, please…
I am an AVID op-shopper. Thanks to trying on a fabulous watch my bestie suggested a few years ago and, incredulously paying $15 for it, I was hooked.
Now, going into a retail store is a rarity for me. It’s all the same!
It’s all sooooo boring!
I love the hunt for the buried treasure and boy, have I found some!
(Of course, I still go to Tar-Jay for me undies; I’ve got standards!)
But I love op-shopping, I really do!
It wasn’t always this way.
I am British born and, for my family, going into the ‘Olly Olly shop’ was something only ‘poor people’ did.
(How ‘olly olly’ could be a diminutive of Opportunity Shop is beyond me!)
The irony is: we WERE poor people! My parents were totally broke for most of my formative years and all of their fights were about money.
If only Mum HAD gone to the Olly Olly shop, things may have been different!
Back to the story….Last week, I found myself in a strange land….
After dropping another bestie to the airport, my lovely GPS made me lost. Always an adventure! So I took the Opportunity to pop into a new Opportunity shop in an unfamiliar suburb (did you see what I did there? Did you?) I love discovering more of Melbourne this way!
Best of all, the Op Shop I meandered through had a café in it!
Who would have thunk it? Lucky Moi!
After having a good browse and scoring brilliant purchases, I was drawn to a kitsch, internal café setting.
Two gorgeous, French, painted tables & matching chairs (clearly discarded because they were cold enough to produce instant haemorrhoids!) invited me to take a load off and have a $2 cuppa! Yay that!
My English Breakfast was served in pretty white china pot-for-one, matching creamer & sugar bowl, on a sweet little tray.
It really was a sight for sore eyes, as my Dead Dad would say! I felt truly blessed and abundant to be taking a moment for a rest and a warm drink on a cold day. I’d been up since 5.30am in chauffeur service, to my travelling friend!
Plus…it was hard work, carrying the brand new $1 designer tee for my giant teenager! I was happy to sit back and be waited upon!
A family of op shoppers cackled past while I enjoyed my cuppa, and I looked up to see an elderly Mum & Dad, with their adult daughter and her son.
I said to the daughter, whose smile would light up the MCG, ‘You look really beautiful’.
She looked aghast at me, turned around to see who else was there and said ‘What? What did you say?’
‘You look really beautiful! You’ve got such a gorgeous smile and a lovely face. I love your outfit too. You look terrific!’
Sadly, this woman screwed up her face, really screwed it up and shook her head.
Men don’t crap on like pork chops when we tell them they look hot! They AGREE with us! God bless ‘em!
Why is it SO hard for women to take a compliment? Not just any compliment Peeps, but a random, heartfelt affirmation from a Goddess with a cuppa!
Not satisfied to have my compliment refuted and stomped in the mud, I reminded her of that very fact.
‘Let’s start again, shall we? Hi! You look really beautiful today!’
And of course, the glorious smiling Goddess shined her glorious Goddess smile at me and realised her folly.
‘Thank you. Thank you so much. I really appreciate that.’
‘So remember it. And be kind to you’
And that was that.
Not wanting to sound like a goody-two-shoes-crawly-bum-lick, but I just LOVE telling people when they look great!
I’ve had the most wonderful exchanges with strangers and we’ve both moved on feeling much smilier for the love.
And I had never been given a compliment, either, apart from ‘you’re old enough and ugly enough to look after yourself!’ Yes, that gem was delivered to vulnerable 13-year-old-me, wearer of Nana Mouskouri glasses. And I believed I was ugly from that moment on until relatively recently.
I never received compliments…. So I started giving them.
To my gorgeous friends, my divine son, colleagues. People I saw in shops or on the street.
One of my favourite memories of Random Compliment Delivery was while walking Moby The-Wonder-Dog along the river track in Warrandyte, a riverside outer suburb of Melbourne, where I lived for 2 years.
A dapper, fit, elderly gentleman wearing a suit, fabulous fedora and carrying a stunning bouquet of flowers walked briskly towards me on the river trail.
‘You look fabulous! I love your hat! And you’re certainly scoring some Brownie points with those flowers, young man!’
‘Young man? It’s a long time since anyone has called me a young man! Thank you. I’m 82!’
‘Well, I’d never have guessed that. You look sensational. It must be walking along our beautiful Yarra that keeps you so sprightly’.
‘Yes it does. And thank you again. These flowers are for my wife. It’s her birthday today. She passed away 3 months ago and I’m going to put them on her grave’.
Even writing that has made me teary. I remember that chat so vividly. He was very much in mourning, yet his sense of purpose and resolve was inspiring.
Rather than stay home and wallow in his pain, he had chosen to step up and be in it. To feel it rather than push it down with alcohol or cigarettes or bad food.
He’d combed his hair, put on his Sunday best and bought some flowers for his girl.
We chatted for a while about how he was feeling, how much he missed her, how empty his house felt with her gone.
How pleased he was that he was going to talk to her today, comforted in the idea that she would hear him. He had a strong faith.
‘I must be off, now. Don’t want to miss the bus. Thank you so much for saying such lovely things and thank you; for the conversation. You’re the first person to speak to me today. Us oldies often feel invisible. Thank you again, you’ve made my day’.
That sweet old man had certainly made mine. And with a dip of his lid, he was off, carrying his lovely flowers for his Beloved.
The difference between these two Random, Compliment Receivers was profound. One; a woman one third (perhaps?) of the way through her life, rejecting some love.
And one man, nearing the end of his life, only too willing to absorb any love thrown his way.
Your word IS your wand, Beloveds!
If we keep affirming we are fat and ugly, that’s what we create. I said those words to myself for years and I believed them. And so became both fat AND ugly!
I’d been told them often enough as a teenager by well meaning adults (Yup. Lovely.)
I’ve been working on changing my emotional DNA for half my life and, I can truly say that these days, I am very kind to me. . Oh, the relief! Self-loathing is soooo tiring!
I monitor my thinking (Gah! I’m an idiot!) with a remedy to counteract it.
I challenge my friends with a more loving alternative when they cut themselves off at the knees.
I’ve invested decades and many, many hard-earned dollars in this deep, personal healing work.
You can learn how to speak lovingly, to manifest what you want and to create the life you dream of, by practicing what I will share with you.
The Buddhists have a proverb:
“To know and not to do
is not yet to know”
Confucius said the same thing:
“I hear and I forget.
I see and I remember.
I do and I understand”
Come and play with our gorgeous Manifesters on Monday May 19th.
We all need to be reminded of what we have learned before, and with putting it into practice; we can change our emotional DNA slowly and gently.
If you want more compliments, give them.
If you want love, love yourself. And then love yourself MORE.
Speak kindly to yourself and others will do the same.
Have a relationship with YOU and then, you’ll attract the intimate relationship you want.
Does this work?
Can I prove it?
Yes. I’ll show you proof on May 19th!
Can’t be bothered? All too hard?
This is NOT for you! Only those with a willingness to learn and a preparedness to take ACTION need apply for our limited spaces.
I hope it’s you. We have SO MUCH FUN! Can you imagine me doing anything that ISN’T FUN? No. That’s just ridiculous!
Hope to see you on Monday May 19th!
The Random Compliment Giver and Goddess
(And I rock! Ta da!)
P.S. Once you’ve booked your ticket, you’ll get an email showing you how to download the PDF you need.
Just for fun, I’ll include one of my favourite music videos, given some of the content of this blog. If profanity alarms you, do not watch it! But it IS fun!